I absolutely LOVED this!!! Wonderful questions Tolly with such beautiful, honest and heartfelt responses from Tanya.
"could your feelings for your other partners threaten your feelings for your husband?". I responded "no more than my love for my second child threatens my love for my first child"
So great to see you here Julie!!! I appreciate that becoming a mother inspired ~more~ dimensionality to your identity. That’s what I’m enjoying about these conversations, the creative ways moms have affirmed themselves and their sexuality, while being awesome caretakers and partners.
Tanya THANK YOU!! I wasn’t kidding about tearing up, some of your responses will really help people I feel. ❤️ Appreciate not only your conversation with me, but your journey to get to this place!
I am THRILLED by the thoughtfulness of this series, Tolly. Thank you for writing it. Tanya your reflections in this piece (and your Medium post) align beautifully with my experience as a fellow queer, poly, married mama.
I'm currently working on a memoir, Forsake All Others: My Journey from Monogamy to Many Loves (working title). In it, I describe the juxtaposition between my husband's attitude about coming out and mine, my fears of the vitriol and personal and professional risks. I'm grateful for your reflection, "There seems to be a special brand of sexism and slut-shaming reserved especially for women like me." It feels deeply resonant and is EXACTLY the quote I spent two hours looking for yesterday for my book proposal.
Sincerely, huge gratitude to you both for this piece!
Leila, thank you so much! Your memoir sounds amazing. (You should follow Molly Roden Winter on Substack, she's also got a memoir coming out about her open marriage!) Really glad to have you here. :)
Thank you! Yes, have already pre-ordered Molly's book and have been emailing with her. Very excited that both of your voices are part of the growing conversation about polyamory!
Thankyou so much Lelia. I cannot wait to read both your memoir, and Molly's. It is so wonderful to connect with others who share in these experiences. It is incredibly affirming to find other polyam mothers who are out and open!
I agree wholeheartedly! Polyamory felt quite isolating for the first decade, and it's thrilling to see such momentum around the conversation. Thank you again for being part of it, particularly as a fellow poly mama.
Related: did you see this cover story from The Cut? I haven't finished it, but I look so forward to diving in more:
I absolutely LOVED this!!! Wonderful questions Tolly with such beautiful, honest and heartfelt responses from Tanya.
"could your feelings for your other partners threaten your feelings for your husband?". I responded "no more than my love for my second child threatens my love for my first child"
Exactly ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
Wasn't Tanya's response to that so beautiful?? Thank you Abbey for reading!!
From Lady Di to group sex in one seamless work of art! Delightful writing + really brilliant guest contributor. Thank you!
Love you so so much Ross!!!
What a great interview. I spurred us to explore after my kids as well. I think something about that big life change shifted everything!
So great to see you here Julie!!! I appreciate that becoming a mother inspired ~more~ dimensionality to your identity. That’s what I’m enjoying about these conversations, the creative ways moms have affirmed themselves and their sexuality, while being awesome caretakers and partners.
Great to see you too! I think motherhood helped me accept what I'd been suppressing. Menopause even more so.
Thankyou Tolly, for your interest in me and my thoughts, and for exploring this subject in a non-judgemental and helpful way.
Tanya THANK YOU!! I wasn’t kidding about tearing up, some of your responses will really help people I feel. ❤️ Appreciate not only your conversation with me, but your journey to get to this place!
I am THRILLED by the thoughtfulness of this series, Tolly. Thank you for writing it. Tanya your reflections in this piece (and your Medium post) align beautifully with my experience as a fellow queer, poly, married mama.
I'm currently working on a memoir, Forsake All Others: My Journey from Monogamy to Many Loves (working title). In it, I describe the juxtaposition between my husband's attitude about coming out and mine, my fears of the vitriol and personal and professional risks. I'm grateful for your reflection, "There seems to be a special brand of sexism and slut-shaming reserved especially for women like me." It feels deeply resonant and is EXACTLY the quote I spent two hours looking for yesterday for my book proposal.
Sincerely, huge gratitude to you both for this piece!
Leila, thank you so much! Your memoir sounds amazing. (You should follow Molly Roden Winter on Substack, she's also got a memoir coming out about her open marriage!) Really glad to have you here. :)
Thank you! Yes, have already pre-ordered Molly's book and have been emailing with her. Very excited that both of your voices are part of the growing conversation about polyamory!
Thankyou so much Lelia. I cannot wait to read both your memoir, and Molly's. It is so wonderful to connect with others who share in these experiences. It is incredibly affirming to find other polyam mothers who are out and open!
I agree wholeheartedly! Polyamory felt quite isolating for the first decade, and it's thrilling to see such momentum around the conversation. Thank you again for being part of it, particularly as a fellow poly mama.
Related: did you see this cover story from The Cut? I haven't finished it, but I look so forward to diving in more:
https://www.thecut.com/article/how-polyamorous-relationships-work-ethical-non-monogamous-rules.html